My halo, pray it won't fade away.

URGH.

2009-04-18T21:28:00.002+08:00

It's not easy, and it's never easy.

I'm still not done studying for Monday's Anatomy Test.
-Embryology
-The whole of Upper Limb.

WTF. shoot me.

You're getting old! :)

2009-04-11T03:59:00.006+08:00

10/04/09.

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY,

DENISE!

Irish Coffee, and this is the best.
Ben Ten! haha
Kishur and Raj.

...: You took pictures with almost everyone BUT the b'day girl. why?

...: I know! I forgot, and I was running late! Mov starts at 1.30, and I won't wait for SURYA!

Next b'day to remember, MOM'S.

and I DONT SHARE!

2009-04-11T03:24:00.003+08:00

All i can do now, is SCREEEAAAAAMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!

SURYA,

I LOVE YOU

I LOVE YOUUUU!!!!!!

i must meet him before i leave. i MUST!

My root.

2009-04-09T01:35:00.008+08:00

04/04/09.

Batch 24 Orientation for Indians.

Food Court, Level 3.

Yeah, Orientation for INDIANS? that gor me guessing at one point of time as well. WHY? WHY HERE TOO? racist is the word, and that's what we thought at first. but honestly, this whole thing was a good idea after all. We got along with the seniors, and with that, we got help in many ways, and also we're able to join many activities together, like watching a tamil movie together.

We thought we would be going through hell with them, but we were proved wrong. This whole thing was actually a really fun thing to do! damn, i can't wait to become a senior. Then again, I would not want the juniors to be afraid of me, but to like me. :) I'm a nice person, c'mon how can i treat a person like a dog. hmm. So far none of the seniors are treatin us like dogs, not to the girls at least, I'm so sorry boys. haha WE feel for you too.

you know who she is already. LOL
God, i LOVE her eyes!

The guys will never smile, do they?
See, they TRY to smile, but it doesn turn out.
Menaga( brown ), Reshma( pink ), Kani( purple ). Best seniors we have. hehe
She's just jealous! haha
MY camera is addictive aint it Aarthi? hehe
Arun singing. aaah, i was swept off my feet when he sang Nenjukul Peidhidum.

and Abi sang Adiyae Kolluthae.

Boys who were "punished" to spell MISSIPI by their butt. haha

And, the after party.. hehe..

haha, I'm so sorry I'm self-absorbed!

We were head banging! haha

Happiness comes with friends.

2009-04-03T01:35:00.005+08:00

MMMC; Batch 24 Dinner.

Valeyview Hotel, Manipal.

Sashi, myself, RT, Sneha, Abi & Nanthini.
Sneha & I.
Thar & I.

Nanthini & I.
Ash & I.
Shine, Thar, Jacinta & Denise.

Shine POYOOO! haha

Izzati & I.
Arun, our SP Bala. haha
Vidya & I.

The Ceylon sisters. LOL
Jacinta, Sashi, Myself, Dheveya, Ash, Thar, Sneha, Abi, Nanthini, RT & Vidya.

Sashi, Sneha, RT, Arun, Kishur, Arvend, Myself, Dheveya, thar, Abi, Ash, Nanthini, Jacinta & Vidya. :)
Kishur, Thar, Arvend & Myself.
RT, Thar, Raj, Kishur, Myself, Dheveya & Abi.
Vishnu, Jac, Thar, Sashi, Myself, Nevid, Kishur, Raj, Dhev, Ash, Vid, Nanthini, Sneha, Arvend, Abi & RT. phew!
Shar & Myelf.

Shar & Sneha.

Retard 1 & 2. haha

With the friends I have, I don't think I would ever want to leave! hehe.

<3 u guys! :)

End Point.

2009-04-01T19:39:00.015+08:00

End Point, Manipal.

Football fields & Beautiful parks.

Boys, playing footie.

Arvend.

I love this shot of Pravin.

Girls doing what we do best. :)

Sneha

Nanthini.

Abirami.

Aarthi.

Denise.

How beautiful, and no, it's NOT a postcard.

I took it myself! :D
On top of the hill, where end point is.
Part of the park.

India, is a beautiful place, if you know how to apprieciate what it has for us.

For all I know and as you can see, this country has one of the beautiful sunrise and sunset sceneries.

It's going to snow, i know.

2009-03-31T14:43:00.003+08:00

I miss home, and that's for sure.
I'm saying it again, I miss home, and everything there is left behind.
I'm sorry I can't be there, to celebrate any one of your birthdays, especially to all of my family members. So for today, 31/3/2009, I wish my sister, a very many happy return of the day.

HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY,

SHUWANUGHA SUBRAMANIAM.

Once a year I get the chance

To wish you birthday cheer.

It pleases me no end to say,

I wish you another great year.

So happy birthday to my sister,

From the bottom of my heart.And may your good times multiply,

Till they’re flying off the chart!

( I know you may think if something has gotten into me, but haha, i miss bullying u la. ;p)

Ruin it now.

2009-03-31T03:53:00.003+08:00

AS LONG AS I PASS; was anything and everything we could think off this morning after sitting for our Anatomy Class Test. garh. And i think, i JUST passed. LOL.

Chill, it's the very first test I'm sitting for here in India. garh, i hate it when there's competition. They are so kiasu, and I'm becoming one of them. My friend was right, I am, a little bit kiasu, and that runs in the blood of being a quarter Chinese. hmm.

I have that thing in me, that if he or she does better, i'd feel extremely stupid, this FORCES myself to do better. Thats when i'll make myself a cup of think coffee, and try to stay awake, blending notes and drinking erm. It works, hell yeah it does, ONLY FOR A DAY. garh.

When is it I can label myself as a TRUE nerd? LOL.

That's it, tomorrow I'm gona sleep in class again. That's the effect of Nescafe the next day in the morning. My eyes swell, it looks like as if I got punched, and it gets very watery, as if I was drunk the night before. Good enough to look sick the next day.

Another thing, when the dean said that Manipal is a ragging free zone, all he said was BULLSHYT and more SHYT. I pity the boys, as they've gone thru much these pass few days, yet they do it for the sake of doing it. If we don't follow to what the seniors want, they'll mark us, hate us for life, and not share us any of their notes/pass years. Sigh. We need them, and this is what we have to do to get them.

So this Saturday, is the Indian Orientation, where all the Indians of my batch will mix with the Indians from the older batches ( racist I know, but don't ask me why ). The rep for the Indian group, briefed us on what we're to do on Saturday, which is to go up to the seniors and get their signatures, that is after giving the right answer to any of their questions i.e Which senior has a twin brother in this certain batch? The consequence, of not getting all the signatures within the 3 hours, is to spell M-I-S-I-S-I-P-I using our ass! IN FRONT OF EVERYONE! -.- I hope i fall terribly sick, or prolly get bed ridden on that day only. argh.

That's not all, apparently, there's MORE. and we're yet to know, ONLY ON THAT DAY. So let's just do this ayt, let's just look fwd to it, never know this may be FUNNNN.

shoot me now, NOW!

Hasta La Vista!

2009-03-27T03:23:00.003+08:00

UTSAV 2009 FASHION SHOW COMPETITION

taken part, by Batch 24 mates.

Theme: Flora and Fauna

and.. it was DE AWESOME show compared to the others which were boring.

The reason to that is because, this is a fashion show, and what the other uni representative did was just dressing up with normal dresses ( the short and revealing ones) and as for the boys, showing of their body ( not wrong afterall, cuci mata abit. haha). But still, it's a fashion show, yet the girls danced like sfults. More to a clubbing show on stage i would say, which in my point of view, is so out of the theme. Our batch did a wonderful job, and THEY HAVE TO WIN FOR THIS!

We are the ' nerds ' with attitude mayn. haha
ah, influenced already. LOL
L-R: Skan, Kishur, Raj and Arvend.

I spotted this thang! haha
So.. what's for dinner?
Too many to choose from.

The group after their wonderful performance.
The cutest elephant ever! WOOOT! :P

( without that paint on his face, he's OMFG! )

Shine ze znake.
Aww, the cutest couple in class. for real. With Mahen and Shervina.
You guys are the bomb mayn! <3

Two Four, Freeze!

2009-03-26T15:51:00.014+08:00

Batch 24, UTSAV Dance Competition.

It does not matter if we did not win, cos we already KNOW we wont. 4 days of notice and preparations, it's not too bad a job. Most importantly, we did have so much fun. :D
No fights, misunderstandings, we just got closer. heeee!

After getting the Henna done. Dhev and I.

TWENTY FOURR! wooot!
hahaha, how can i miss this.

poor boys, had to put make up on. haha.

L-R: Arvend, Kuharaj, Kishur.

After the performance. no not tired. hahaCaught the guard snoring away.

and, cam-wamming starts... now;

Aarthi and I.
Arvend and Manphreet.
Shine and Sneha. Me, Nanthini, Aarthi.
including.. Sneha.
and Manphreet, and Tharani. lol

Me: Ka Ching, Ka ching, oo yeah!

Aarthi: Ayo, kadavale, why thaya, WHY?

haha!

Ms. Sneha.
Ms. Dheveya.
Ms. Aarthi.
Mr. Kuharaj.
Mr. Arvend.
Mr. Kishur.

Ms. Nanthini.

Siang! Siang! Siang! LOL
and.. Ms You-should-know-who. haha

As usual, it has end in this way;

ask me who's the girl who did that.

Destination Unknown.

2009-03-25T16:59:00.012+08:00

( Please view from bottom up )

While on stage.Tarzan and Jane. haha. Meet George of the Jungle and Tarzan. They're good friends you know.Haha, the local pimp. :PSaturday Night Fever babey!

I look like a ghost, i know, don't have to say it twice. hahaGetting dressed for the Cultural Show. I was suppose to be The British Woman. LOLDance practice; Manphreet and Arvend.This is pakka Indian wei! hahaKrishna temple in Udupi.Aarthi, and her negro.

Shine with his afro. LOL

Ah, feels like home. haha

My study area.

Can you believe it, it's only the 2nd and a half week in Manipal, and I've been sleeping in class!! Reason: 1) Past few days have been hell, coming back latre due to dance and cultural show practises. 2) Because of that, I've been skipping food, dinner especially. 3) Lecturers tend to off the lights whenever presentation is on, and it's dark. 4) My room is fcuking cold even without the ac AND fan! 5) It's so hard for me to wake up in the morning due to that! HAHAHA.

And, the results to all this: 1) HUGE eye bags.

I have an Anatomy class test this Monday and I need to catch up! darn it!

Anyway, so this is my new room (picture attached), and will be so for another 2 and a half years. Chandrashekhar hostel, and I'm loving it. :D It's so near to everything, i can finally wake up at 7am instead of half an hour earlier! haha. too bad, Sharada and Sonia-ians. huhu.

Cultural show was fun, as we got to dress up. The theme was cultural evolution, so basically, our team performed to how culture has evolved from being an ape men once upon a time, and now hip hoping on the streets. So, what's next?

Weeeeeeee. I wanna sleep again...

To my girls and the boys, i'm sorry i havent been updating u guys about myself in facebook, as the connection to facebook here is very bad. i can hardly get into fb, even pics take so long for me to add. So, any updates, its all gona be here, pictures as well. Will take time.

I MISS U GUYS. :(

we Bhangra our way out. ;)

2009-03-21T02:40:00.010+08:00

It's 1am and I don't feel sleepy. Ok, maybe i do a little, but I am actually awake at this freaking hour! haha. My capability of stying awake, and having very few hours of sleep has changed tremendously, and I have no idea what had happened with me. hahaha. How can this happen man? I'm known to be the sleepaholic!

It's been a really tiring week, and apparently, it is just the beginning. We wre kind of ' forced to take part in a non classical Indian dance competition next week, for UTSAV, which is the biggest upcoming event/intercompetition with other schools, and universities here in Manipal. So here it is,we just came here 11 days ago, and this is what we have to do. It's fun, corerographing the very last minute, but I must say, it's so not fun to know that we only have 3 days to prepare EVERYTHING, from mixing the songs, costumes, practising and making this performance a perfect piece. Thank god the seniors are willing to help us coreograph some of the moves, and damn. hahaha. I THINK i can't dance for nuts, BUT it's not too bad afterall!

Not forgetting, I've to dress as the English women, wearing the gown, hat, and walking on the stage so gracefully, which is SO NOT ME! God knows why the seniors chose me for this, but they said it's all cos it suits me most. haha. Well i guess so yeah, the other categories were Ape Men, Cowboy, 70's, and Hip hop, which for all i suck at. hahaha. Pravin and Skantha, will make the best ape men on EARTH, they don't even need a costume for it, so does Shine, Arvend and Siang as the 70's. * night fever, night fever!*. hahaha. damn, that afro. On Siang, he looks EXACTLY like PCK! except there's no mole, but seriously, it's like a mini version of PCK! haha.

Oh darn, in 10 days time is my anatomy class tests. and i havent any time to STUDY FOR IT! I need my set of real bones NOW! gosh. my day will end by just attending lectures, and then my night will end with the practises. I just can't wait for Tuesday, for all of this to be over, but that means that the fun ends too. :( at the moment.

Tomorrow's going to be adrenalin pumping, as we have to go to Udupi to get our props and costumes done, have practises for both dance and cultural show, PLUS, pack and shift to Chandrashekar Hostel. ALL, BY DIS WEEKEND! *screams*

The locals here are so darn talented, and watching them practise on stage day and night freaks us out. sigh, this is so last minute, and it weren't our fault, cos we were only told at the very last minute! We tried negotiating with my mentor, Dr Ullas, but he gave us no chance to speak and reason out the possibility of us winning is ZERO. So what eh, it's all for the fun of it. ;)

I love the Barista Italian coffees in the food court, also the lattes in Cafe Coffee day in the library. yum, thats our spot man!

the coffee was meant for me to study late hours, instead;

Here are a few shots I took with Sneha, Aarthi and Nanthini under a big bougainvillea tree n boy it did nt feel like India at all. haha. ;) We tricked the boys that we went to the studio to take the pictures, and they actually believed it! hahaha. how we love doing this for nuts.

and then these, before practising for the dance. haha. We were so bored, we dressed Kishur up, and he looked so much like a girl! Then there's Arvend with his afro which is infected with Herpes ( as claimed by Skantha ). haha. I say there might be uncountable lice on that thing. STAY AWAY FROM ME ARVEND! haha!

getting used to the place,

people,

food,

and she's loving it here.

" let's nakara people! nakara nakara!"

I need answers man!

2009-03-18T03:13:00.003+08:00

Looking at the body parts, and actually learning the parts verbally with the lecturer is way easier than actually reading, trying to understand, digest and memorise the parts. When I thought I would remember what I've learn this morning, just after leaving the Dissection Hall, it all just evaporates. Gosh, I did not know learning anatomy could be so volatile.

And to that, when I came back, it took me at least an hour to JUST learn the parts of the clavicle bone, it's joints, origin and insertion part of the muscles, etc. NOW, I can't recall what else I've learned today!

Just one thing that amazes me to the maximum, is that GOD is really great in so many ways.

I'm more than startled, to believe that a human's body is SO complex, and complicated that for God, it was an easy task. How on Earth did HE know how to form a human's body like this? IN A VERY DETAILED AND PRECISE manner with all of it's individual specific functions?

Leave the mighty aside, HOW IN GOD'S NAME DID HUMANS DISCOVER ANOTHER HUMAN'S BODY?

WOW, and this will get me thinking forever!

Inspired by life.

2009-03-16T21:17:00.015+08:00

8.03.09

Departure fom KLIA to Bangalore. Had my family, Sujen( whom i would consider as family) and Shobs ( through Skype) over at my place to give their blessings and say goodbye with love. My hearthiest thank you to ALL who've wished me luck, gave me blessings and made me feel comfortable that I'm here in Manipal for one reason- to come back, as Dr Thayasheri Subramaniam.

Grandma, Aunt, Sis and cousins.

Grandmas, Sis, Cousins and Nephew.

Uncles.

Cousins and sisters.

Sujen, and Shobs on skype ( tho she cant be seen, but its her there posing LOL )

Cousins and family in KLIA.

Mom and I.

Arrival at Bangalore Airport.

Loading the luggages into the lorry which goes straight to Manipal.

9.03.09

A night spent in Royal Orchid Hotel, Bangalore. We shared rooms, and my partner was Flora. Rested for only 4 hours, before leaving to Bangalore Airport to take a flight to Mangalore which was an hour and a half journey.

It's antique, and usable!

Dheveya, asleep on the way to Mangalore Airport. Yes, it was a tiring journey.

Arrival at Mangalore Airport.

In the bus, on the way to Manipal. Dad, feeling young for once. LOL

And then, we arrived in Manipal. Met with the seniors, and they gave us a short brief. Seniors (Batch 23) were responsible for that day to bring us around, to shop for our essentials like pillows, pails, brooms and etc. The day was left to us to settle in the hostel, clean the room and unpack.Mr Anand, breifing us. Sitting is the Chief Warden of the Hostels.

Batch 24 students. ( My batch )

Students gathered at the Chandrashekhar hostel to collect the luggages.

My Study Table.

Cupboard.

Bed.

1st Semester, Anatomy, Biochemistry, Physiology and Histology books.

10.03.09 onwards

Exploring places in Manipal, and the seniors were nice enough to held some performance to welcome us, Batch 24 into Manipal. Their video presentation was so good, and all the effort of finishing it in one day paid off! Kudos to you seniors! and Thanks for the warm welcome! :D

Chandrashekhar Girl's Hostel. (not the current one I'm staying at)

MAHE Building. The Admin office and the 6 floor library.

Dad and I.

Food court with variety of stalls.

First floor, for Mass Food.

Locals celebrating Holi ( Festival of Colours )

Manipal Logo.

Friends; Me, Dheveya, Aarthi, Dharsheni, Sashi, Preeta, Ratna.

In Manipal, having an umbrella is a MUST!

Classmates, and this is only 15% of the class. LOL

Seniors performing the square dance.

16.03.09

My first experience with a cadaver. I've always wanted to look inside a human's body, and finally from today onwards, it's gona be that that i'll see everyday! :D Here's a few shots. Try not to puke aye? LOL.

Preserved with Formalin.

Nyeh, NO FEAR!

Don't we look like a Doctor already? LOL

Aafa, Dheveya, Me, Nanthini.

Inspired by life, and will always be.

I'm coming back anyway. haha.

2009-03-06T11:48:00.005+08:00

Today's Friday, yeah and I did not know that. All because, I've stopped counting the days, and marking my calendar. Instead, i'm counting the hours, and better still, the seconds left. trahahaha. OHMYGOD, today IS friday! Which means, tomorrow is Saturday, and the day after, SUNDAY THE 8th!

Okay, let's not make this a big issue.

I am EXCITED.

I am LOOKING FWD TO IT.

Nevertheless,

I AM DEFINITELY, MORE THAN 10569237% sure that,

I AM SAD.

My sisters will be happy there's no noise in the house.

My sisters will be happy there won't be anyone calling them stupid and monkey anymore.

My sisters will be happy there won't be anyone giving the death glare to them.

My sisters will be happy, because, they'll JUST be happy.

But bare this in mind my SISTERSSSS, it's only for 2.5 years. MUAHAHAHAHA! I will be baccck. :P ( and this is when you go, " AW MAYN! " )

ps; omg have you heard PCD's, JAI HO?

Slumdogs are not just a slumdog afterall.

2009-02-24T10:53:00.004+08:00

SLUMDOG DOES IT AGAIN, and AGAIN.

no surprises to that.

Are you surprised by the movie's reception?

" Astonished- not just surprised; by the way it has been received, in America especially. I think it's the core values of the film, the underdog who can come out of nowhere and with nothing, and against all the odds he can succeed. And it's a love story in the end, of course. I think all of us want to believe in that story. "

Danny Boyle.

What is your response to the claims that you are romanticizing poverty in India?

" People we worked with in the slums said, " You're not going to show us as being poor are you? Because that's what Westerners always do." I tried to make the film with a kind of energy that reflects what the place is like, that it has a vitality despite its poverty. "

Danny Boyle.

Picked from The Times Magazine.

Cheers!

Mozart of Madras, I guess it's time.

So la-la-la. ;)

2009-02-20T14:49:00.017+08:00

I did not know drawing could be this fun. teehee.

Who knew? LOL. Being bored can actually unbore me at the end. hehe.

This is why, I can live without Suj but, I actually can't. Who'd be there to play this with me again? ;) ( psst, Suj, don't be too self absorbed. No one wants you that much. hehe )

Dreams on fire.

2009-02-18T11:25:00.002+08:00

If half of Malaysia, and more than half of the people I know is in Australia, where is the other quarter and a half?

Mandeep said Manipal. Oh that better be true.

show me the way.

2009-02-17T21:52:00.002+08:00

I want to know, what's stored for us in our afterlife.

How is it, and does hell and heaven exist.

How does God look like, and if He's in a form of just one, regardless the race.

Where do the souls go, and if there are souls.

How life would be in our afterlife, for better or for worst.

If we see a light, just before we pass.

I guess there's only one answer to it, we have to go through it to know it.

ineedamiracle,

someoneanswerme.

Rest in peace, my dear. :(

2009-02-17T11:05:00.004+08:00

I woke up this morning with an eerie feeling, that something was not right. I thought maybe, it's because I was suppose to get my vaccination today, double dose, and bare the pin pain which I hate. I thought maybe, my puppy Buddy was not going to eat nor drink again, and I can't watch him starve that way. I thought maybe, this would be the last day for him. And all I regret now, was to actually think of the latter. How could I possibly think of such, and for now, I know, that for certain things you think of that may happen, will happen.

2 months ago, I was more than excited to know that we were getting a new member in the house, you. When Ruhi jumped of joy and came into my room, just to tell me that we were going to get a new puppy, I could not stop to stare but to just jump with her. The next day, when my aunt brought you here, you were wrapped cozyly in a cloth and put into a box. It was wee early in the morning, Max was barking, and so I woke up. I woke up to see you in the box, looking straight up at us, and I can never and will never forget the innocent look in your eyes. I felt happy, to make you my other 'brother' whom I would play with all day long. I felt sad, you were parted from your mother, and your other siblings, and I wondered, how can you puppies take that? I told myself then, I will not make you feel like you were alone, and it was our duty to take care of you like any other.

My niece and nephew came on the same day, to welcome your arrival. You were more than happy to have children beside you, to cuddle and pat you till you sleep. I obviously do not understand dog language, but honestly, I could feel you then. There were arguments on your name. Patches, Rex, and finally we agreed on Buddy. I'm happy to say, that Buddy suited you most, as you were our best buddy/friend and the most lively one I would say. You were my companion, and you kept me busy while I was bored.

It was my daily ruitine, to look after you everyday, while my parents were away for work, and my sisters to school. I was the only one at home to look after you, give you a nice warm shower, feed you, to play catch and run, and allow you to bite my jeans and shoes when you were hyperactive. Those were the times, I had the best time of my life with. To actually have you by my side when I'm alone and bored at home. Now it's just mere silence, and more boredom. Your bark was just one of the cutest bark I've ever heard, and I loved it, although it could be a nuinsance after some time.

You barked in the middle of the night, mom will be the first to wake up to check on you. Then she'll wake me up, with no complains, I'll be up and ready to clean your cage, let you out to play in the middle of the night, and to give you your supper. When you're satisfied, you will sleep silently till the next noon, when it's time for your lunch. I missed all those times Buddy, and I know I'm gona miss it even more. Having a puppy was definitely not an easy job, but I cherished every moment with you. Every joyful moment.

I remember the times, when I let you out for play, the first place you would make yourself comfortable with is at one corner of the garden, near the swing, where the flowers are, and you'll snuggle yourself in, and just rest your head. The way you did it, it's just one of the cutest thing I've ever, ever seen. I will never forget that, never. When I'm in the kitchen to prepare your meal, you'll just tail me, make a round around my legs, and sit under the sink, waging your long tail, waiting to fill your stomach. You would look up to me so innocently, just wanting me to get done with the food already and let you eat. You eat so fast, that I was so fascinated by the way u ate, also, you would lick the bowl clean there was not a grain of rice. So clean, that I did not need to wash the bowl. Now, I'll just miss all that.

I missed doing all this with you for the past 4 days Buddy. Missed it more than anything, and I've whispered that to you. I hope you understood me. I missed hearing your bark for the past 4 days, I missed running aroung with you for the past 4 days, I missed preparing your meal for the past 4 days, I missed leashing you out for the past 4 days, I missed letting you bite my slippers and pants for the past 4 days, I missed cleaning your wastes for the past 4 days, I missed giving you a hot bath for the past 4 days, I missed carrying you and cuddling you for the past 4 days, I missed you hugging my leg for the past 4 days, I missed everything. I guess now, I'll miss it even more, as I know, I won't be getting anything from you anymore.

I'm sorry, Buddy if we were not good owners. I'm sorry if we did not take care of you like how we should. We could have been better, I'm so sorry for everything. The past 4 days when you were ill, I'm sorry I did not notice your body turning yellow, as you were down with Jaundice. I'm so sorry for force feeding you, that might have made you even more ill, till you were also down with Pneumonia. I AM EXTREMELY SORRY. :'( While in the car today, holding you, and hoping that you would hold on and not let go, I stroked your head and your body, while holding my tears till my throat hurt, covering you with your towel as it was cold, I looked into your eyes, and you stared back at me. At that precise moment, I could feel you, like how I did the first time I looked into your eyes. You looked at me, as if you were trying to tell me something, something that I would not want to expect. I knew that the moment u stared at me, you were trying to say that you were going to take your last breath anytime now, but I ignored it, all because I did not want you to go. But I knew so clearly that was it. Your eyes were a miracle, it just spoke to me.

We took you to the vet early this morning, and she was a very good vet. The moment she told us the chances of you surviving was low, I burst into tears, and still am pouring buckets. I can't help it but to think that you were gone already. I can't belive it myself, you just fell so ill overnight. I don't wan to regret mom's and my decision of putting you to sleep. That was the best option the vet gave us. I feel so bad, and I feel like it was a wrong choice. But I heard your groans, and you were vomiting so badly, I knew deep inside you were in pain, and you are JUST A PUPPY. I could not take it when you started groaning so badly, I cried like I've never cried before. The vet pressed your ribs, and you groaned even more. That hurt me bad, and the vet said you would go any minute now, even without Euthanasia. I did not want you to rest in peace with pain my dear, I could no longer endure your suffering. We made a choice, and just the next minute, you were gone. Carrying you back home, and to bury you in your most favourite spot in the garden, was a very difficult moment for mom and I. We were very close to you, as we did everything together for you, while the rest only enjoyed playing with you.

Everyone loved you Buddy. EVERYONE. From my grandmother, to my smallest niece. Hearing your death, they will all be devastated. My grandmother loved you as much as I did, and once she's back from India, she would be more than upset to know that you are gone. In fact, the first thing she would do once she's back is to call out for you, or feed you with some biscuits. Now, it'll be all different for us. We're going to miss you so much, Buddy, I can't explain it more. I love you, and I'll try to stay strong for you.

REST IN PEACE

MY LITTLE PUPPY

BUDDY. <3

iwillalwaysloveyou.

The word 'goodbye' should be scrapped off the dictionary.

2009-02-15T20:20:00.002+08:00

One left, and another to go.

I could not believe neither could I get it in my thick skull that she was already leaving, leaving to Australia, 8 hours away from here.

Now, she's off; and I am not prepared.

When Lokzha left the first time, it was hard, and there were tears. Today, I was strong enough to accept Shobini's departure, moreover when she will not be coming back this year. I held on to it, so long I know that there are no goodbyes, it's just untill we meet again. Early this morning, was Mirosha's flight to Melbourne as well, and I felt satisfied calling her wee early in the morning just an hour before she left, and prolly would have offed her phone then. Nevertheless, I grabbed my phone and hoped she would just pick up the call, and when she did, I just felt relieved. Thank god for that, I did not want to be a friend who doesn care, as it is, I've totally forgotten Anjali's departure, and that made me feel terribly stupid not to find out and keep myself updated.

Everyone's going, and going and going. Who's left?

I'm next, only difference is the place and country. Not as 'posh' as Australia, but I'll survive. gee. After all the insults, I guess all I've learned to do is to ignore it and get on with life cum my medical degree. I'm gonna miss everyone, and I am already feeling it. garh.

for all i know, love is infinity.

2009-02-14T11:20:00.003+08:00

Valentine's Day, pray, tell me what do you think about it? To me, I just don't believe it as much, maybe because I havent found the right person to celebrate and embrace this moment with. But now, who cares, it's just over commercialized.

As what Oprah has said, you don't have to be " IN LOVE" to celebrate Valentines. I second that. As it is, love is unexplainable and can be of many forms; loving my family to loving my closest of friends ever. To that,

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY to

appa

amma

both my sisters

all my family members

Max and Buddy

Dhevia

Dienesh

Lokzha

Sathesh

Shobini

Shalini

Shrawani

Sujen

all my other friends; and

myself. ;)

LOVE you guys every bits and peices, thus I can't explain that further.

hugsandkisses.

Kudo's to my pair of legs!

2009-02-07T18:00:00.003+08:00

I honestly thought that I was going to end up on a wheelchair tomorrow morning, but I guess I just have a good pair of legs. Walking for the first time for Thaipusam from Maha Mariamman Temple, in Jalak HS Lee in KL, all the way to Batu Caves in Selayang is hell of an experience. Seriously, I did not expect it to be a painful yet a fun journey throughout. Having cousins who are just whacked and sharing crazy ideas and suggestions, plus friends who waits or tries to catch up with me, thinking I am far ahead from them, just makes me feel much better without actually enduring the pain in my legs, especially my feet during the long walk! On top of that, I guess I deserved it much for wearing the wrong pair of shoes. garh. But oh well, through experience from today, it'll be a better walk next year onwards, and i'm so up to it! (:

This year, since it was my very first time, I walked with my family members, which included myself, mom, sisters, Kajen, his mom, Thar, Anu akka, her sister, Mohana akka, her husband, and Selvan annai. So we all gathered at Kaj's house and took the Paramount LRT to Pasar Seni. At the same time, Sujen was updating me about the situation in the LRT stations. haha. From today till Sunday, would be the only days that you can meet the Indian communities, and the kind of Indian people all over this country; from the nice ones to the most irritating rascals. The train started becoming packed especially from KL Sentral onwards, and boy I could not breathe fresh air. haha.

Anyhoo, once we've reached our pit stop, Pasar Seni, we walked all the way to one of the junction opposite the temple where the chariot will pass and starts it's journey. That was around late 11pm when we arrived, and waited across the streets at a bus stop for the procession to begin. While waiting, Kaj was telling us how the walk would normally be. Apparently there were cows pulling the chariot, and I was astonished, as I've never seen cows pulling the chariot. Normally, it would either be men power or the trucks pulling the chariot. I guess, this was more traditionally done. Even at that point of time, there were estimated about 1 million people all waiting to start the walk! That's ALOT of Indians! I just felt like one of them. haha, durh, I AM one of them. We were so bored while waiting, and bored of talking, as talking would make us feel much more tired, we decided to count the foreigners who attended the procession. Yeah, that bored.

Then finally the chariot came from the temple, through a narrow road. We could hear voices shouting out " VEL VEL" from miles away, and we joined in for just a few minutes. haha. We prayed, and started walking on our own, without following the chariot, as if we were to follow the chariot, it would be a longer journey in term of hours, and that would be more tiresome. So that's when we started walking with the crowd and into various roads, I can't even remember for myself. While walking, I was updating my journey with Sujen and Sathesh; I still cannot believe it that Sujen and Dienesh actually thought I was walking way ahead from them, when the truth was, they were way ahead from us, plus, Sathesh and his friends were walking as fast as a bullet train and were at least one and a half hours ahead of us. garh, how do these people do it? haha. Bet they must have started earlier, durh. Sujen and Dienesh then joined us halfway through the journey, and all the talking and chitter chatters just made the journey seem shorter.

Another thing is, I just can't understand some of these people's mentality and attitude. The people I'm talking about are those Macha Rempits and very few Minah akkas. LOL. ( yeah, my cousins and I came up with that while walking as well, looking at them at the side of the roads ). Hell, were they the most annoying creatures on Earth, and I don't undertsand WHY are they SO lifeless, that they have to just either sit on their ugly looking bikes and disturb the girls, or show off with their bikes in front of many. WE HUMANS go there to pray, and not to do dim-witted stuff like that, I just don't get their mentality in this. They speed, and some even met in a massive accident, and actually died on the spot. Yes, while we were walking, we saw a few of those. Nevertheless, we could not give a damn but to scream out, " You bladdy hell deserve it!". Maybe, God was punishing them for their ridiculous actions as well. Irritating mutants I tell you. What are the policemen doing about it? My mom was so close to throwing stones or hitting them with a hockey stick, but I told her, yeah do that if you really wana start a fight here. -.-

Oh well, the walk was good overall, and we reached Batu Caves at around late 4 to early 5 am. Then again, we walked up the 272 steps, including more steps on top to another small temple. MY LEGS COULD ACTUALLY TAKE ALL THAT! Well at the same time, I told myself, if my mom and aunt could do it, why can't I? LOL. It's all in the mind. teehee. While walking down from the steps, I.saw.Sujen.BALD! haha. That was funny, and luckily I was not stepping at the edge of the stairs, as I would have fell off laughing at him. aww, he looks like Mr Potato anyway. :D Oh and what a surprise, I also me Dheveya! It was really a pleasent surprise! Wanted to sit and talk to her, but time did not allow as she was rushing home and my family members was in the midst of walking up. Well, she was not the only one, I made Sathesh sit like a dope in front of Geetha's and i bladdy hell did not know what that Geetha thing is and placed. Only when I've started walking up the stairs i saw him halfway through. I was waving like a jackass but I doubt he could see clearly, weirdo doesn wear glasses although he should. -.-

Time to go back then, after making a visit to all the other temples there. This part, I’m so not gona touch. We walked extra miles, searching for transport, either a bus or a cab, but somehow we seemed rather invisible to them. Garh. This is when I felt like amputating my legs there and then. Seriously, let’s not talk bout that. Haha.
I’m up to it next year! Tho my vacation would be in February, and IF Thaipusam falls in the February again, you better count me in. teehee.

HAPPY THAIPUSAM!

ghostwhiteme.

2009-02-06T13:06:00.001+08:00

Your dominant hue is blue, making you a good friend who people love and trust. You're good in social situations and want to fit in. Just be careful not to compromise who you are to make them happy.Your saturation level is very low - you have better things to do than jump headfirst into every little project. You make sure your actions are going to really accomplish something before you start because you hate wasting energy making everyone else think you're working.Your outlook on life is very bright. You are sunny and optimistic about life and others find it very encouraging, but remember to tone it down if you sense irritation.

prayers,answered.

Oh shit, i spilled my drink ;)

2009-02-05T16:38:00.011+08:00

I use the word ' Oh Shit ' and so do you, don't deny it. So, WE use the word ' Oh Shit ' for any small and unneccasary matters or in fact, when we're in any ridiculous situations; i.e You almost stepped on dog shit and you scream out ' Oh Shit ' like as if you did step on it. That just gets people's attention, and it's hillarious towards the end. Check this out for a change, this is when we should really scream ' Oh Shit' on top of our lungs. teehee. Then again, it's still hillarious, so sue me for that, I just fell off my chair laughing out loud.

I just need my say.

2009-02-04T18:06:00.003+08:00

I am a good driver, and I am not.

Passed my slope, side parking and three point turn. That all went a breeze.

BUT

This is where I say, I'm not a good driver.

I effin hell failed my road, all because

I TOOK THE WRONG TURNING!

Okay, so I won't deny that I took the wrong turning. It was terribly foolish of me to not know the route after 20 classes of practise on the same old road. Anyhoo, it struck me when he asked me to stop and change seat. I mean, come on, I could have just gone on although it was not the test road, but I could have just drove like normal, because that's what they're testing us for aren't they? To test on how one drives and handles the car on the road! How does taking a wrong road affect the way I drive?

I guess there's only one reason to all this, you testers just HATE your job. ADMIT THAT. You hate your job for sitting in the car, candidate after candidate, different faces and RACE, and just holding a pen and a paper, thus all you do is to mark a tick or cross, and at the end, bang the chop onto the paper and throw it to our faces, without even replying "You're welcome" as a simple gesture. On top of that, getting paid like a garbage cleaner. Well, hear this, it's so not our fault! Okay, I did admit it I was wrong, but according to the law stated in the JPJ road rules for testers, it is all right for a candidate to make a wrong turn into a different road, as long as he/she obeys the rules and the testers get to test on what the candidates should be tested on, it is FINE. F-I-N-E, FINE! I did not make that up, but was told by one of the speaker of that particular driving school, and he assured me right as he just came back from a course about road tests and it's mentioned there!

It's effin obvious, that you people fail us the first time just so you get your coffee money, and where is the fairness in that? Haha, again I was NOT surprised, when while waiting for my turn, waiting like a donkey under a pathetic shed, I've observed, that those who were driven back by the testers are mostly of my "kind" of people. If one is driven back by the tester, then that person failed the road test, and I was one of them. A small mistake, and out you go, come back next week.

I was sitting in the room, talking to a friend of mine about how my driving went, and vice versa. Sitting next to us, was a Malay girl, and she just joined our conversation. Good enough, she passed the test. Best part was, she said that she used the QTI road, which is much shorter and easier to pass on. We, the black sheeps, had to go through the normal JPJ road, which is the test road. So I thought, there are only two reasons to why she took the shorter road. A) She must have paid them extra. B) Because, she's one of their "kind". To me, I think it's both. Even if she hadn't paid the extra, I guess she would have still gone for B. WOW. Kudo's to this country. (: Speak about racism eh?

I have no say to this, in fact, not at all. I still got to respect him who tested and will be testing me next week, because, hey, he's the TESTER! Please him, is all i can do. INSYALLAH, I would pass next week. -.- No comments. No comments. I'll pay you the god damn RM140, just pass me off.

the WORLD needs it, not just one.

2009-02-02T22:05:00.006+08:00

Just yesterday, when my mom stopped at a nearby tol, there was a charity box next to the Touch N Go scanner. Written on the box, was a label, 'TABUNG PALESTIN'. We saw only the box dedicated for the Palestanian, and my cousin popped out a rather inquisitive question, " So, what about the Sri Lankans? Mana Tabung Sri Lanka?". That got us thinking, true enough, Palestin is not the only country going through much hassle, there are others as well, and why is this country only serving for that one country? Where is the humanity, in this act? Yes, donate, donate all we can to those who are in deep need, but why only put in much effort for ONE PARTICULAR COUNTRY?

My cousins husband sounded and stood up for the other countries that need funds and aids; i.e Sri Lanka. Apparently when they were in a restaurant for dinner, a teenage boy who may have just left school approached them for donation to the unfortunate victims in Palestin. Without any hesitation, he asked the boy, " Is this donation only going to Palestin, and why?". The boy answered, " I do not know, I'm just doing what I have to." Fair enough, he was doing what he has too, thus has no mature answers to adults with much curiosity. That got onto his nerves and sternly told the boy, " What about Sri Lanka? Isn't that country going through a massive turmoil as well? Don't waste my time if this is just for one country." This may sound rude, harsh, morally wrong to judge one country and its situation, but honestly, it's not our fault, it's this country's and the government's fault for not lending their hands to other countries. Why? Is it because it's a Non-Muslim country? Not to be racist, but frankly speaking, is that humanely right?

This is to ALL. ALL who's suffering, and dealing with death. Read this, hear this. It's coming from the heart of one who cares for ALL and not just one. Stand with me, if I'm right.

Can you hear a cry for help,

from a distance away,

for the victim seeks salvation,

for the pain is here to stay.

As the fading whimpers,

reaches to an abrupt end,
for up above in the darkened skies,

arrives an angel.. truly a Godsend.

When the little boy reaches out,

the angel instantly disappears,

is this all nothing but a facade?

simply played about by his fears.

The boy lay cold and helpless,

in the run down streets of his mind,

he lay there hurt and battered,

looking for a light..anything as a sign.

His hopes are nothing but dreams,

his nightmares are as good as reality,

consumed by fear and anxiety,

hoping one day, he would be free.

I did not do this, but I believe in every word. I found it on my computer desktop, and if this is my sister's work, I'm really really impressed. :)

1800- HELP OUT TO ALL!

patience-take that.

2009-01-30T11:33:00.004+08:00

I've longed to hear a song that suits me BEST in my situation right now. Thanks to suj, now I've found it.

Patience by take that.

Just have a little patience

I'm still hurting from a love I lost

I'm feeling your frustration

Any minute all the pain will stop.

Just hold me close inside your arms tonight

Don't be too hard on my emotions.

'Cause I Need time

My heart is numb, has no feeling

So while I'm still healing

Just try and have a little patience.

I really wanna start over again

I know you wanna be my salvation

The one that I can always depend.

I'll try to be strong

Believe me I'm trying to move on

It's complicated but understand me.

'Cause the scars run so deep

It's been hard but I have to believe

finally, it calls.

2009-01-28T17:12:00.002+08:00

Pass me a calendar and a pen; it's time to mark the date.

March 8th.

I'm left to be independant.

I'm left to be on my own.

ican'tbelieveit.

When once upon a time, I had ample time.

2009-01-27T19:18:00.002+08:00

daling, tell me, what's NOT amusing anymore. sigh.

Once upon a time when I used to be thrilled by this thing called Friendster and now, Facebook.

Once upon a time when I used to be amazed by the buttons on the remote.

Once upon a time when I used snap kazillion pictures of myself, more than often.

Once upon a time when I used to be narcissistic, more than often.

Once upon a time when I used to call my sisters an inane, or worst.

Once upon a time when I used to critisize the way my sister eats.

Once upon a time when I used to glue my eyes on the computer screen.

Once upon a time when I refused to change the radio channels.

Once upon a time when I used to play SuperDrop Mania on my phone.

Once upon a time when I used to cut my own fringe by curiosity.

Once upon a time when I used to scream under my fluffy pillows.

Once upon a time when I used to dress up and feel stunning for 10 minutes.

Once upon a time when I used to break my piggy bank to buy Galaxie.

Once upon a time when I used to beg my friends for posters they did not want.

Once upon a time when I used to paste the unwanted posters in my room.

Once upon a time when I used to scribble my table saying I am great. which perhaps, is utter rubbish.

Once upon a time... and the list goes on.

NOW, ....

nowsherihasnothingtodo.

my body and it's instincts.

2009-01-25T13:37:00.002+08:00

I despise my body, and my body despises me.

This is why, I'm soon to study bodies, to reason out why my body despises me.

iwasinpain.

this is my say, and i hope it's not going to change our friendship, at least.

2009-01-23T12:30:00.003+08:00

To you,

By the way, it’s not like I’m trying to shun u now. It’s not that. I can’t explain myself. I’m sorry. Some things are just not meant to be known and it’s probably better set aside that way. Nevertheless we're still friends who would share ones sorrow and joy, no? Whatever thing, I’ll be there for you and to lend a hand; like how friends would always do to each other. That’s definitely not a problem, but only with one condition, to keep our boundaries. You might be wondering, why abruptly and why have I changed my mind in a toss of a coin? In fact, no, I’ve been thinking about this and it has been very thorny times. Difficult in a sense, which I’ve to put a minor stop to this. As I said, and will repeat myself, that if things are meant to be like how it's suppose to be, so it will. Just give it time. Anyhow, I need my time as well, and I’m pretty sure u do too.

Again, I know you are probably in awe, so what about the promises that I’ve kept with you? That I’ll never leave u again? Who says I am going to leave you anyway, I will always be here, but of course, this time, in a different form. I just want the best for you, and I don’t think I am nor would be the best. I know u might think that this is just an excuse, but people say I deserve better. Maybe I do, or I don’t. However, I’m not going to judge. Because to me, it's not my main concern to decide which guy or type of relationship is the best for me right now. And I’m going to make myself very clear right now, that I do not want any commitments and attachments with anyone right now. Based on that, I’ll give you my word. Just so you know, this is all not happening because of anyone else, or perhaps you may think, someone in particular. NO.

Let’s just do and achieve what we're supposed to, done. Once we are, and in future, still so happen to be the high school sweethearts we were, who would stop us?
I’ve said what I have to. I know you’re not going to point out anything right now, until the time comes for us to “sit and talk". Perhaps, if I’ve anything else to mention later I would. Right now, I just want you to know, that I’m trying to pay no heed to what I’ve had for you. It’s for our own good to move on. And when I say move on, I meant move on as in studies wise and dealing with issues with my family. You’re definitely not the apple in my parents’ eyes right now, you should know that. There’s definitely no use to further what we have right now for each other, all I see it's a waste.

All the times we had together will definitely be the most cherished moments. And I WILL treasure it, more than I would treasure any other. There’s always room for more new things, and all we got to do is embrace it. Whatever it is, remember, “When the sun shine, we shine together, told you I’ll be here forever, said I’ll always be your friend, and you can stand under my umbrella.”

Sealed with heaps of loves and kisses.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Date: Friday, January 23, 2009
Good and evil, happiness and misery, merit and sin depend on man's actions. As is the action, so is the result. But today man ignores the law of action and acts as he pleases. It is easy to indulge in sinful deeds but it is extremely difficult to bear the bad results they yield.

iwillalwaysloveyoustill.

Cynical.

2009-01-22T22:02:00.007+08:00

Take a look, it's dim-witted, but makes sense.

it's life when i'm bored.

think twice, and move on.

2009-01-20T18:00:00.007+08:00

I gave myself much and enough time to think, think about what I have thought during times I despised myself, and times when I actually thought I was of no use and futile. Right now, I only think that that was when i was actually "immature" and basically, had nothing else better to think off. It was just the negative side of me. Correct me if I'm wrong, but perhaps everyone goes through this crucial time of our life, when we weren't mould into young adults who were inquisitive enough to even make any decisions.

Today, I sit here, accepting wisdom and what it has done for/to me. I can't believe it that at that one point of time i actually thought i would not thrive as a medical student. Today, I proved myself wrong. Today, it is my aptitude and believe that i had no choice but to oblige to myself. Today, I am actually truly grateful and appreciative of the oppurtunities that I have, given by my elders to pursue my future and carreer in a most noble and professional occupation- a doctor.

Although being turned down by a few universities that I had dreamed to pursuing my studies at, i.e University of Adelaide and University of Melbourne, both placed in Australia, I thought twice about it and convinced myself that hey, Aussie aint the only place that I can study abroad at. It isnt. It was an eye-opener rather, to search and get family and friends' advises on other countries that are even more recognised than the med schools based in Australia. So, I told myself, why not give it a shot. Afterall, we all are going to come out as a doctor, holding a MBBS degree proudly in our hands and being cherished by our close family members and friends. Afterall, we all would come back to our mother land and serve the country; again, i find no harm in that. Afterall, Australia is not the only place to be startled of if one goes there to study Medicine.

Being disheartened that I am now most definitely not able to study in the country I've dreamed off, I took it postively and brought myself up to at least give a try to the other Universities that are as recognised, or even better in Medicine. Without any doubt, my second try to Melaka-Manipal Medical College went a breeze and with much expectation, I was offered a seat. Now, the only thing buzzing in my mind is that, people may think this Medical College is no longer recognised and why waste time and money pursuing in a university that would not guarantee my future as a doctor. Might I add in, that your thoughts and rumours have just brainwashed you, and the truth is that it's otherwise. Yes, at one point of time, Manipal Universities were not recognised by MMA and the Indian Government, but if you were ever too curious to know, since mid last year, there were no problems and was re recognised back. Myself being cautious, I did ask a few, and coming from the horse's mouth, I was assured that I am not taking any risk now, and so in future. Then again, this would just be a basic degree I would hold in future, but being a Science and Medical student, putting a halt here will definitely make me as an ordinary doctor without any speciality. Not a problem I see, to graduate as a MBBS holder from Manipal, and later step forward into my postgraduate degree in somewhere better off and more recognised. In my opinion, this is how I see it as, not only economical, but also, reasonable.

Anyway, I still gave a shot for Penang Medical College which twins with RCSI and UCD in Ireland. When you hear Ireland, you just go wow. But honestly, saying and hearing it is not as simple as actually going there and doing it. I would not deny the fact that the milieu in Ireland is much more encouraging and creditable to study compared to in Manipal, but the vast difference of these two, is the experience I'll get. Of couse, Ireland is much more costly than just doing it in Manipal, thus the amenities are better, but at the end of the day, it's the practice and familiarity that I'll get in Manipal. As mentioned by one of the senior from Melaka-Manipal my parents and I were having a little chat with, the type of cases students get and are given the reponsibility to handle is just so rare, and unforgettable. "I still remember all the cases i dealt with 3 years back in Manipal, and I do not think I can ever fail to remember", was just the right motivation she gave me. Even to my parents, that startled them and actually considered Melaka- Manipal as the best university to attain in-depth knowledge in Medicine. Not forgetting, that students get hands-on with the patients and corpse, which really excites me; compared to else where which only provide dummies to the students. So where's the excitement and thrill in that?

Anyhoo, I am waiting for the results from PMC, which will take 3 weeks from the day I sat for the interview which was today. This particular interview was the most challenging and argumentative, which got me goosebumped, nevertheless, this was just a mere adventure ride. Looking at how i judged both sides, I favour Melaka-Manipal more than PMC based on knowledge, guidance and experiences, yet again, it's still up to my parents to where they are affordable with. As my mom keeps on shoving one thing in my head, " Don't forget you have two younger sisters for us to educate Thaya", I therefore would give my emphathy as an eldest and go on with what may not seem to be the best, but to me, it is.

So back to business, once I'm graduated as a doctor, I "command" you to greet me as Dr Thayasheri the next time we meet in 5 years time. hehe, self absorbed much. ;)

Aiyah, just do MBBS anywhere lah, master and specialise in somewhere like Ireland, that's what matters the most, no?

A boy was watching his grandmother write a letter. At one point, he asked:

"Are you writing a story about what we've done? Is it a story about me?"

His grandmother stopped writing her letter and said to her grandson:

"I am writing about you, actually, but more important than the words is the pencil I'm using. I hope you will be like this pencil when you grow up."

Intrigued, the boy looked at the pencil. It didn't seem very special.

"But it's just like any other pencil I've ever seen."

"That depends on how you look at things. It has five qualities which, if you manage to hang on to them, will make you a person who is always at peace with the world.

"First Quality: you are capable of great things, but you must never forget that there is a hand guiding your steps. We call that hand God, and He always guides us according to His will."

"Second Quality: now and then, I have to stop writing and use a sharpener. That makes the pencil suffer a little, but afterwards, he's much sharper. So you, too, must learn to bear certain pains and sorrows, because they will make you a better person."

"Third Quality: the pencil always allows us to use an eraser to rub out any mistakes. This means that correcting something we did is not necessarily a bad thing; it helps to keep us on the road to justice."

"Fourth Quality: what really matters in a pencil is not its wooden exterior, but the graphite inside. So always pay attention to what is happening inside you."

"Finally, the pencil's Fifth Quality: it always leaves a mark. In just the same way, you should know that everything you do in life will leave a mark, so try to be conscious of that in your every action."

Buddy.

2009-01-18T12:48:00.005+08:00

Let's add a new member to the family, preeeesenting...

BUDDY!

It's time for us to get a new pet, as our current one, Max is getting old and rusty. LOL. Old enough to be considered as our Buddy's great grandfather. huhu. Nevertheless, we're all still family. Boy, from Patches-Max Junior-Rex-and now, Buddy. We finally agreed to this name although we're not sure to which name he's used to already. LOL. Guess he's still young, he'll adapt. awwww!

when 2008 feels like now.

2009-01-13T20:19:00.008+08:00

Today felt good, as I've finally gotten the chance to meet some of my shall-i-say long lost friends. LOL. Well, not really long lost, but it just felt like a long ago story. 2008 is sooooo last year. Nevertheless, I've never forgotten my true friends I had and spent my whole 2008 with. Today, I did not only say my goodbyes to my dearest of friends (althought not all), I walked away feeling content. Not only that, in fact, I've made new friends. Thats the best part on top of catching up with old rusty stories. One things for sure, I'll never forget these people, as for one point of time in 2008, they really made a difference to me. Thus myself, who had no other choice but to adapt to these rare species.

So how do weeeeee keep in touch? In any random moments, one of us WILL get a beep on the phone, and out of the 10 msgs we may get, 5 is and most definitely from any one of us, and thats what keeps us together, although knowing each other ONLY for at least a year. Moreover its there little simple messages that keeps a smile on my face, in fact, on any.

Kumar Sexayeh (as he has saved it himself in my phone ): Oi, how have you been? Lol, I know this is outta the blue, but it has officially been my first week of IMU, and to be very frank, I've just realised how much I missed you guys at Taylors, and coincidently, I was in ss15, so just a couple of hours ago-seeing the new batch of Sam-ies.. Lol, so again, how you been?

Or probably after a meet up, something like this;

Mandeep: Hey! Today was awesome :) It was nice to see you again. Hope we can do this next time around :) Take care, gonna miss you. :'(

All I've gota say is, Kabhi Alvida Nah Kehna. And if you dont know what that means, go check it out. ;) Never Say Goodbye.

its a girl thing.

2009-01-12T15:37:00.012+08:00

It'll be something to remember, BECAUSE, the drama is complete. :)

To you shobs and lok. NEVER FORGET THE TIMES WE ALL HAD TOGETHER FOR THE PAST UNCOUNTABLE YEARS, but then again, EMBRACE THE NEW COMING AHEAD. :))

itsagirlthing. ;)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

RANDOM, CUTE, AND ENORMOUSLY FARNY.

sigh, if only. LOL.

She just tempts you, doesn she?

Now we know what this guy does. LOL

Like ol' times, uhhuh.

This is tooooo cute, guess who? LOL

sherilovesrandom ;)

born as one. :)

2009-01-11T13:25:00.003+08:00

I'm flattered, and couldnt be any better! Suj, u made my day. (:

Yesterday, the doctor I consulted for my allergy made MY day. So here's how it went.

Doc: How are you, Thayasheri? So what's your problem? :)

Me: Some rash im getting, and it's getting worst after mom got me this cream from the pharmacy. (shows hands, legs and the cream) It became worst last night and this morning. garh.

Doc: What did u eat last night eh? So mother diagnosed the daughter, got the medicine from the pharmacy, and child suffer. Classic role. LOL

Me: HAHAHAHA! Speaking through experience eh. Fish, but i think i got this after i got back from our trip in India.

Mom: Yeah, she ate some certain fish there, and got it then. I think it's the fish u ate in Uncle's house, Thaya.

Me: (Nod).

Doc: Oh well then, yes thats one thing, so now, keep away from seafood and nuts. Try to be vegetarian, it wont kill you. Don't you hear the chicken cry when u eat it? Don't you hear it cry for help?

Me and mom: HAHAHAHAHAHA. NO?

Doc: Well I do u know, thats why i dont eat them. And to tell you the truth, u actually become a better person. A kinder person with more love and compassion. In fact, not only the humans, but to the animals too. I know im trying to brainwash you to be vegetarian, and I can see it in you, you will. Haha.

Me: Erm, haha. yeah i guess.

Mom: So are you vegetarian doc?

Doc: Yes, I sure am. But my house is not. Haha. I try to brainwash my children to be vegetarian but they cant seem to live without chicken. I think i can make your daughter one tho.

Mom: Haha, u better doc. I guess it's time.

Doc: Do u know what your name means Thaya?

Me: No, i never knew. (looks at him with full of curiosity, and turns back to mom, hoping she would know)

Doc: It means LOVE. Thaya (Daya) means LOVE. and ure filled with love, i can see that in you. :)

Me: Awwwwwww! Thanks doc!

Mom: Hahaha oh i see, and do u know what happened in the IMU interview she went for? They asked her to describe what kind of person she is, and she said that she's a loving and caring person.

Me: ( oh yes ma, tell the whole world ). LOL.

Doc: Ah, im not surprised, cos she is! And she's intelligent, i can see it in her! If I was the interviewer, looking at her name, no doubt i would mark her green. Unfortunately, I'm sitting in this room. Haha.

Me: Awwwwwww! Awwwwwww! :)

So that was what happened in the room. Instead of telling me my problem, well which he did actually but not much, he made my day with all those compliments!

and today, after Suj telling me that he decides to tattoo his name in Sanskrit, i wanted to know how my name would be spelt in Sanskrit. So he helped me search, but he did it half by half. Yes true, Thaya means Love and Compassion. What about Sheri? LOL.

Sheri : Darling.

And the more I should go, AWWWWWWWW! Thanks suuuuuj! LOL.

So i wanted to look it up, forced suj to pass me the link. hehe. First and foremost, my name Thaya was originated from Daya. Same pronounciation, only different spelling. A lil unique, no?

DAYA (usually spelt daia in Punjabi), from Sanskrit "Day" meaning to sympathize with, to have pity on, stands for compassion, sympathy. It means ‘suffering in the suffering of all beings’. It is deeper and more positive in sentiment than sympathy. Daya, cognitively, observes alien pain; affectively, it gets touched by it and moves with affectional responses for the sufferer; and cognitively it moves one to act mercifully, pityingly, with kindness and forgiveness. Daya is antithetical to hinsa (violence). One imbued with daya “chooses to die himself rather than cause others to die,” says Guru Nanak (GG, 356).
Daya is a divine quality and a moral virtue highly prized in all religious traditions. In the Sikh Scripture, mahadaial (super compassionate), daiapati (lord of compassion), daial dev (merciful god), karima, rahima (the merciful one), etc., have been used as attributive names of God (GG, 249, 991, 1027, 727). In Sikh ethics, too, daya is inter alia, a basic moral requirement, a moral vow. “Keep your heart content and cherish compassion for all beings; this way alone can your holy vow be fulfilled” (GG 299).
At the human level, one can comprehend feeling of another’s anguish, but as a theological doctrine it is to risk allowing suffering in God’s life. This has often caused much controversy in theological circles. God does not suffer in the sense of pain from evil as evil, but may suffer compassion (daya) as bearing the pain of others to relieve them (of pain as also of evil). That is why at the time of Babar’s invasion of India, Guru Nanak, when he witnessed the suffering of people, complained to God:

So much agony were they put through
So much anguish did they suffer —Were you not, O God, moved to compassion?

The girl's name Sheri \sh(e)-ri\ is a variant of Charlotte (French), Cher (French) and Sherry (English), and the meaning of Sheri is "little and womanly; beloved, dear".

AWWWWW! What else am i to say? LOL. I'm born as one. (:

SO, who wants some ' DAYA' (love)? You know i've got plenty. ((:

sheriwithlove,ahnodoubt. ;)

Myself = Detested

2009-01-09T10:04:00.006+08:00

ONLY WHEN I THOUGHT THINGS WOULD GET BETTER,

IT JUST GETS WORST.

call this a good start for a new year. fcuk.

when the tie never ends.

2009-01-07T12:15:00.016+08:00

What would you do, if everytime you fell in love with someone you had to say goodbye?

been there, done that

What would you do if everytime you wanted someone they would never be there?

been there, and still there.

What would you do if for every moment you were truly happy, there would be 10 moments of sadness?

been there, and still there.

What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got the tell them how you felt?

should it happen, i wish to tell my best friend now.

What would you do if you loved someone more than anything else and you could never have them?

i had it, and lost it once.

This is to you, to all my dear amigos and ohana.

Dheveya Sinayya

Dhevia Kalyana Sundram

Dienesh Ananth

Gitanjali Subramani
Kishen Sivakumar
Kumisha Aravind
Lokzhashini Nimisha
Mandeep Bains
Mirosha Manoharan
Rajika Magheswaran
Sathesh Ram Karu
Shalini Julia John
Shobini Balraj
Shrawani Shekhar
Sujen Ratnam
Thareni Siva
Thatshalaa Shan
Thushaaraam Semaadderi
Vaishnavi Jeyasingam
Varsha Sivalingam

Some people live and some people die,

But I want to tell you all I love you, and you are a true friend,

That I will always be here for you when and if you need me.

You might be best friends one year, pretty good friends the next year, don't talk that often the next year, and don't want to talk at all the year after that,

So, I just wanted to say, even if I never talk to you again in my life, you are special to me and you have made a difference in my life,

I look up to you, respect you, and truly cherish you.

One of my 2009 Resolution,

TO KEEP MY BESTEST OF FRIENDS WITH ME! (: Dostana

sherisolovesherfriends! (:

whacked out!

2009-01-06T17:12:00.007+08:00

Okay, remember i said that i abso-hate driving? well, second thought, i think it was not thaaat bad. But having sujen in the car, teaching me, OHMYGOD, haha, he was worst than my driving instructor, but i managed. Yes Suj, if I shut up and listen I can get it right, and so that happened. LOL. Just be thankful that I did not drive us into the lake, or hit the car, or for the matter of fact, hit the monitor lizard which crossed the road! LOL. But overall, we did it for the fun of it. teehee.

After lunch, we headed to this open area, in front of a huge lake, somewhere near KGNS, also near Shal's place, and started doing my rounds, WITH suj next to me. Gear One is stiiiiill the bad, but oh well, i'll manage it with more practice. Suj thought me another way to "feeeel" the clutch, as how he says it. That's easier but somewhat risky to do during the driving exam. Anyhoo, I did my rounds and then we headed on the road. All I know is that I was NOT in a panic mode, until they started making noise like as if there was a ghost right in front of us, and I'm gona hit it, and tada, we're in heaven. With a little music, and ookay relax, I would have done it queitly and smoothly. garh. Whatever.

Went out, swayed the car left and right, which made Suj pray harder so he'll end up in heaven instead of hell, and repeated the same route again. The same route I use during lessons with my driving instructor, yet he did not believe me so FINE. LOL. I believe myself, I believe in myself. haha. Next thing you know, we thought of kidnapping Shal, and give her an adventure on the road. :D Called her, got her into the car, her mom looking all so worried, especially when she looked at me sitting on the drivers seat, nevertheless, we told her bye bye and drove awaaaay. hehe. That was fun, that part.

There is a video of me learning to drive with Suj the great, nothing much, but LOVEBUG was playing at that time, it was recorded along. This whole video seems really really funny to me, somehow. Unfortunately, it's taking years to upload the video on this blog, with no apparent reason! nevermind. teehee. JOOOY!

Here, i look like a dork!

good girl gone BAAAD!

2009-01-06T10:33:00.003+08:00

2009, IS gonna be a bomb. I presume. BECAUSE,

RIHANNA IS COMING TO MALAYSIA!

RIHANNA LIVE IN KL 2009 is part of ‘The Good Girl Gone Bad Tour’, the second world concert tour by the Barbadian singer to support her album ‘Good Girl Gone Bad’.

RIHANNA LIVE IN KL 2009 is scheduled for FEBRUARY 13, 2009, FRIDAY, 8.30 p.m. at STADIUM PUTRA BUKIT JALIL.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!

count me in baby, and who's with meyh! (:

shericantwaitandhopestogo!

the cow car.

2009-01-05T12:10:00.006+08:00

Hear me,

I ABSO-HATE DRIVING! It's nerve-wrecking, mind blowing, crazeeeee thing to do!

When i thought that driving a car would be easy, all because it LOOKS easy, i bang my head twice on the steering, regretting to why I have to do this! I want to, but why? Darn it, i'm just a beginner, i know, but still! I'm not getting much encouragement, confidence and the comfort zone is definitely zero. I know it's just my second lesson, and i'm preety sure my driving instructor who claims has been teaching for almost 20 years+ is already annoyed with me. His sighs and grins just makes me feel better, does it? I'm on the road, facing other cars, trucks, motorbikes and lorries, at the same time holding my breathe just to make sure i don't kill the both of us, all just on the second lesson! HOLY BROCOLLI, I'm still alive and kicking! i need two thumbs up for that, oh i so do.

I hate it when im in a tight situation, when I'm thiiiiiis close to getting a stroke, and there u go, i have someone sitting next to me, behind, or wherever, trying to make me feel better and not choke and die. But honestly, i only think those kinda people who are think that they're trying to make me feeeel better, is just making me feel worst. Worst till the only thing i can do to stop their chattering mouth is to just give them the death stare and make them read my lil mind, " Shut it, or WE are dead!" I'm not tryna say that my driving instructor is a pain in the arse while i'm driving, i mean, i am in the car, learning to drive and he's there next to me talking/alerting me in the most uncomfortable manner! It's just something I am not too fond off, something i can't control in myself, so haha, sue me for that.

While I'm tryna concentrate on the road, and all the cars tryna overtake me, because apparently im a learner driving the Kereta Lembu (L), my driving instructor who at that time thinks im a little play girl, just learning what a tractor is, distracts me and says:

Mr K: Oh look in front, what do you see?

Me: Erm, what do i see? ( and i think to myself, cars? road? traffic light?, and so i thought, ) Oh! traffic.. police? (when i actually do not see one standing there. I have NO TIME TO THINK of what's fcuking on front of me!)

Mr K: No No. See closely, see the tractor?

Me: ( I search frantically for the tractor, and I see it. WOOOO, a tractor!!! ) Oh yeah, yeah. uhhuh.

Mr K: He's your friend, your company. He's going slow for you, he knows you're coming. ( He gives a smile which does not look like a smile at all )

Me: Err, uhhuh. ( I giggle) Oooookay?

Suush already, there are too many cars! and u're showing me a tractor like I've never seen one before???

Mr K: Okay, go straight, press oil, RELAX, dont worry, WHY SO TENSION? Ok ok ok quick brake a little, now press clutch, PRESS CLUTCH quick, hold the brake, change to gear 2, HOLD THE CLUTCH, leave the brake, TURN, now TURN, press oil, go go dont worry! look left, ya mirror, look! check for cars now.. now! sigh...

Me: ( WTFCUK MAN! ) oh..oh..wait..oh..ok..there..ok.. phew (CHILLL OUT! u're fcuking freaking MEEE OUT! all that in a go??!)

Mr K: Ok, now say bye to your company, you're gona go faster than him!

Me: (I turn to the left) err, hehehe, ok, byeee? ( And i turn back, asking myself WTF am i doing here?)

I DON'T NEED ALL THIS! and i certainly do not need to meet any of my company on road!

nevertheless, it was fun tho. hehe.

my dear suj, good luck handling me tomorrow. muahahaha!

counts.

2008-12-23T10:02:00.002+08:00

Count down to my 18th : 14 hours, 840 minutes, 50400 seconds.

Count down to a white Christmas : 2 days, 48 hours, 2880 minutes, 172800 seconds.

Count down to a sparkling 2009 : 10 days, 240 hours, 14400 minutes, 864000 seconds.

Sue me, if my math is wrong. I dont care, it's around there. teehee.

EMBRACE A NEW YEAR, and guys, spin the record, all you gota do is JUST DANCE. ;)

sherileavesitherefor2008,turrahwithlove.

A jingling beat.

2008-12-22T10:26:00.023+08:00

Jingle bells, Jingle bells, Jinglle bells rock!

It's the end of December, and in a few days time, it's Jinggling Christmas. All I can say is whathefcuk! Okay, let's not go so far, in a weeks time, it's 2009! I've never expected it to be this fast, not to forget the fact that we are certainly gonna age faster! Well anyway, since tomorrow would be my last day of 2008, HERE, I'm gona put it all down in this blog about what college life has been for this 12 months of the year 2008.

January 3rd, was the day I stepped into college for our Orientation. Boy, how I felt lost walking through the buildings, classroom by classroom, not knowing a single soul. I took a deeep breath and patiently searched for someone i knew, regardless whether that person was my close friend or otherwise, as long as he/she is no stranger, and as long its someone I could confront to for help and be with throughout the whole session instead of just being a lone ranger and pretend walking through a dark jungle. Anyhoo, I deep bump into Rukshana, and I could not deny it, but i was relieved. I know, I know. hehe. Just yesterday, i opened the files in our Winanga-li CD, and clicked onto the Orientation hoping that I would NOT find a picture of me in my class attending the Orientation, but, I my hopes failed me.

Ohgod, look at how we all were on our first day! So good, and innocent, QUIET, organised, ATTENTIVE! haha, obviously, that ALL changed by just the next week! See that blouse I'm wearing, it sucked, i made a terrible mistake buying that from Giant. The sales lady convinced me to it, and then I never wore it again. Never even thought or tried to wear it on again. hehe, I looked fat in it!

February was the month that we had the most fun, bonding and getting to know others from different classes, cause obviously this after this month, it was all about books and assignments. So why waste the chance we had? Sam Fiesta; Disco Night was the bomb! The whole night was massive! We dressed up, stepped into the hall, lights were out, just the lasers and music! Can you believe it, the floor was vibrating! The music and the bass was super massive, and none of us wanted the night to end! I had a lot of fun, and that was for sure. The teachers were very supportive and open about this event, they shook their bootay too! Since then, I thought, hey Taylors cant be that bad after all! heeee. Here are a few shots from the CD we recieved.

Nothing that I can remember of from March to May, i guess cos we were too busy with exams and assignments. Oh yes, the teachers briefed us on the marking schemes and assignments. I almost got a heart attack at that time, but to think of it, it wasnt so bad. hehe.

In June, it was my first and last college trip to Belum Island! Cost me a bomb, but it was nothing to regret paying for. If you enjoy nature, this is what nature treats you with. I came back with leech bites at almost every corner of my front body, and I'd probably have lost weight due to the exerted activities and food that your tastebuds would not be very fond of, but who cares, this was what the excursion was all about! To live and appreciate nature. :) Mrs Kalpana forced us to go for the trip, at one point of time I thought i would be wasting my time there not studying as Mid Term was almost near. But at the end of it, I regretted regretting at that time. Thank god i went for it. hehe.

July to August, we were so busy preparing for the Charity Drive. We took more than a month to actually decide on what activities that we could come up with to raise funds for charity. So, my class finally decided to sell cupcakes, keychains, T shirts, sand bottles and have a lil fun with water balloons. The end results, we almost got RM1000 from the sales, and that was all we need from our class. :)

From the next month onwards it was preparation for trials and the finals. We never really thought of having as much fun as we did during the beginning of the year, but nevertheless, we still made some time for each other, and that's what truly matters.

Back to the month of December, when u can hear bells and see mommy kissing Santa Claus under the mistletoe. The very last month of the year, and the month when my birthday falls the last. garh. But still birthdays come only once a year, so cherish every moment. teehee.

HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY TO ME! woooot.

Just before I leave for holidays to India, I would pass my end of year messages to my buddies through here, so guys READ IT. teehee. ( without any particular order )

Sujen Ratnam: You have been a little pain in the arse, but still you're my brotha from another motha. haha. THANKS for everything that you've done for me, from giving good advises, criticising on my pictures and advising which to put for as my progile pictures, helping me out on my relationship status with him, helping me get through hard times with my mother as she always get backs to you at the end of the day about me, giving me rides to anywhere and especially when I need it most, keeping my sister company when I have other issues to settle while we were out, giving me confidence and advises about my future plans, and whatnots. Overall, THANKS a bunch for everything. :) By the way, your wish might just come true. teehee, might be seeing u in Bukit Jalil next year dowh.

Shobini Balraj: You're just one person I can always rely on, and one person that can sometimes understand how I feel about certain things, cause some of it, is what you go through as well, and what you think of too, it's all similar as mine. You're one person I know that I can always get to for help in any way, regardless the time and day, you'll always be there. Your love and care to not only me, but the rest have really brought us all together as one, and nothing less. Plus, you're one camwhore i lurve taking pictures with! THANKS for all that shob, and you owe me pastries! Hopefully next year we get to meet each other in Melbourne or which ever part of Australia, although for at this moment, my first choice is for IMU. But anyhoo, GOOD LUCK for your results tomorrow, I know you'd do better, as you're always smarter than me. hehe.

Dhevia Kalyana Sundram: She's my babbbyyyy! ;) And baby, can you believe it, we've known each other ever since we learned how to write in PILLOW in proper letters. Although i still remember there were some point during our childhood we never used to speak to each other, but hey, so what, we were just shy and full of ego when we were young. haha, think bout it, it's all the opposite right now! 12 solid years we're still as friends, and how am I glad to have u not only as a friend, but as a sister. An elder and mature sister. :) All the emotional turmoils that we've gone through together of relationships and parents, school and others. I can just pick up the phone and tell you my problems, you're simply one person who would not judge. Even if you do, it's a mature decision and advise that you give me at all times, and I'm living it. THANKS for everything dv, and for being there for me when I need it most. THANKS for listning to me and thats most important.

LOKZHASHINI NIMISHA PULANDREN: Eei you pigg! I can never forget you for one, because I still remember during Form Four, you actually made me hate boys, any boys whether they're cute or not, cause they're still labelled as the male species, and girl, I still wonder, how the hell did u manage to do that to me? LOL. But obviously, that did not last long. hehehe. Still, I was surprised myself! Your sarcasm and jokes which were not really jokes at all, still made me laugh! Your company was what amazed me, and there was never a time i regretted actually making you my bestie. Form Four, before actually getting really close with the rest, you were the closest I had. The fights and arguments I had with (....) at that time, you were the only one who stood by me. That was the past, even now, you're still the same ol Lok I've known ever since then. :) THANKS for being your very own self lok, even after you're back from Kiwi Land, part of you is still the same.

SHRAWANI SHEKHAR: Shwaaaa so lawaaaa! heeeee. I would label you as my horny friend. haha don't get offended by that babe, but u know what i mean. You're the ONLY one who would get my dirty jokes and actually laugh about it, whilst the rest, sigh, disappointing! hehe. There may be times during primary school when we were not to fond of each other, but hey, time changed everything. You're one person who's got determination in your passion and everything you do (i.e Dance). Not only that babe, what I've realised in you is that you never will give up, and take critics with a open heart. Remember the hard times we had when Aminda used to criticise the dance move? Well, you never gave up, instead worked hard and brought up a better group. Those were memories, although part of it were painful memories etched into our heart. And to that babe, you have inspired me to be a stronger woman, cause you certainly are one. Due to that, a heartful THANKS.

SHALINI JULIA JOHN: I miss you lady! I guess Shobs surprise birthday in Sunway College was the last time I met up with you, and looks like it will be for 2008! NOOOOOO! :( Anyway, you whacked Shalu Bhalu Tahu Malu, you were the BEST SITTING PARTNER i've ever had in my entire soon to be 18 years of life, i sware! All the random, stupid and foolish moments we had together, especially with Mrs Loo! That's something I can never ever forget. The memories are just enough for me to tell my grandchildren in future! You always made me laugh, even when i was/am down, YOU were always there to keep a smile on my face. You compared me to your worst case scenarios JUST to make me feel better of myself. You helped me out in many hurdles, especially during SPM, and we went through it together! Even now, although you were the third person between me and him, you never judged, and had your ears free on both sides. THANKS for everything shal, I could not ask for anything else but you as a good friend. :)

DIENESH ANANTH: You're just like a little brother to us, and Sujen is no where near you for that. haha. He's more to the stupid wild side, and it's irritating. As for you, you're nothing like that! You're the most caring, loving and appreciative boy that I've ever met compared to my other guy friends! Although your sense of taste in choosing gifts for girls are down the drain, but no worries, fashionista guru is always here to help you in that, and that's what makes me laugh the most. hehehe. You sometimes come up with the most craziest and unlogical theories in life, with Dv, but so what?! Thats what keeps us together, and so lively. So you kind little small boy with a moustache, THANKS for being a goodie two shoe good friend. :)

And to the rest,

Ho Ho Ho, MERRY CHRISTMAS!

AAANNNNDDDDD

Wishing you a NEW YEAR, sparkling with happiness, success and JOOOOY!

just.

2008-12-18T10:16:00.002+08:00

I SCORED A 44/50 FOR MY UNDANG TEST! woooot, I'm an IDIOT. haha.

justs'thingtoremember. ;)

yes yes yeeess!

2008-12-17T10:20:00.002+08:00

Finally, we awaited, and now it's here. I am thankful, I am happy and I am certainly more than glad to achieve a good TER, based on my standards. The more I was content, when I actually expected a TER of 80 or above, and not more than 90. To my astonishment, when I accidently pressed the Tertiary Results button, it popped out before my eyes and thoughts, written there in blue, a TER of 92.54. I could no longer believe what I have achieved, as I've prepared myself of gettin at least a 85. I guess it's better getting more than expected rather than less. However, the only thing that's keeping me on the fence, is my entry to University of Melbourne for Bachelor of Biomedicine, which requires a TER of 95. Although I did not manage to fulfil their minimum requirements, I am still trying my luck to push through my application. At least, that would be better than just leaving it hanging just like that. I've done my best, so now it's all left to HIM to decide where I actually stand in future. Other than that, my applications for Bachelor of Science, pursuing into Biomedical Science is confirmed to be a firm offer, according to my college's Placement Centre.

So what is it that I will do eventually?

My only ticket in pursuing into Medicine, is to do it locally in IMU. Even so, I would apply for the twinning programme, which IMU is affiliated with top Australian Universities. If this does not work out, then it's down to Bachelor of Sciences which I've recieved offers from the University of Adelaide, University of Tasmania, University of Newcastle and University of Western Australia. I only hope for the very best now, and it's all my luck, because I know that I have done my very best, and there is certainly nothing wrong with it. Others may have scored better, yes, I may have felt intimidated, but this is about me, not them. It's my future, not theirs. So why should i bother? LOL. What comes, comes, and I'll accept it that way. :)

All right, so I guess I would be having a good holiday trip to India afterall, and my birthday, Christmas and New year would not be a bum after all. teehee. Gosh, how i hated that feeling when I got to know that the results were coming out this early morning. My heart thumped hard, I could hardly breathe. I could feel my blood rushing through my veins and adrenalin pumping its way out through every part of my body. I even almost choked my friends to death, them looking at me having a nervous breakdown, I figured they would have a cardiac arrest. Sorry ya'll, it's all for the love. hehe.

To you Ms Shobini Balraj and Ms Shrawani Shekhar, GOOD LUCK MY DARLS.

To you Ms Dhevia Kalyana Sundram, ah, just kick butt. :)

no no nooo!

2008-12-16T22:35:00.002+08:00

Year 12 results
SACE students in South Australia and Asia, and NTCE students in the Northern Territory, should receive their results in the post on Wednesday 17 December 2008. Students can also access their results online from 8.30 a.m. (South Australian time) on the day, by logging in below.
Don't forget to log in below and get your PIN now.

OHMYFUGOD!

http://www.ssabsa.sa.edu.au/results/index.htm

sleepless nights.

2008-12-16T12:50:00.003+08:00

I so desperately need sleeping pills!

Don't freak, i'm trying not to freak as well, but seriously these pass few days are just mere torture, I can't seem to get proper sleep all night! I wonder what my body is up to, and what's causing me to NOT get a good sleep at night. Every night, it's all about tossing and turning around. Every night, I wake up at least twice to rush to the toilet. Last night I woke up four times. There is no peace of mind, and no peace while i sleep. What's happening to me? I wake up feeling so tired and sleepy, i feel like i need more sleep. I read the papers the other day, and there was an article about sleep, and sleep deprivation. Everyone knows that I'm certainly and most definitely not sleep deprived, because the one thing I love doing the most and can do to win a Noble prize at is SLEEP. But then again, the article did mention something that kept me wondering, and kept me seeking for answers. Anyone can just lie down on the bed, close their eyes, and wander off into wonderland. It's not about the quantity of sleep, which simply means how long you sleep, but what's most important is about the quality of your sleep; and that's what I'm lacking of. The QUALITY of sleep. I don't have it, so where can I get it. How can I cure this?

So I thought bout it, and the one thing that came across my mind is Insomnia. I know, this may sound crazy, but out of curiosity, I googled it, and I'm dumbfound by the results I'm getting. It's just so similar to what I'm going through every night, but I hope and kind of doubt that this may be it. Well anyway, here's what it says.

What is Insomnia? : People who have insomnia may not be able to fall asleep. They wake up during the night, and not be able to fall back asleep, or they wake up to early in the morning.

Relative to my situation, not really. Yes, I find it hard to fall back asleep once I wake up for my toilet breaks. No, I definitely do not wake up so early in the morning, without my alarm.

Is Insomnia a serious problem? : It's not really a serious problem for health, but it can make you feel tired, depressed and irritable. It can also make it hard to concerntrate during the day.

Relative to my situation, with no doubt. Exactly what and how i feel every morning when i wake up, in addition with the mild backaches and shoulder aches I have to endure.

How much sleep do I need? : Most adults need about 7-8 hours sleep each night. You know you're getting enough sleep if you don't feel sleepy during the day.

Relative to my situation, no doubt, yet again. I may sleep within that period of time, or even more, but again, it's not about the quantity. I feel ultimately sleepy during the day, the ones who tries to call me every noon should know bout this. haha. I'd be dead on my bed.

How am i to treat this? ( answers are rather funny tho )

Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, including weekends, even if you didn't get enough sleep. This will help train your body to sleep at night.
Develop a bedtime routine. Do the same thing every night before going to sleep. For example, take a warm bath and then read for 10 minutes every night before going to bed. Soon you'll connect these activities with sleeping, and doing them will help make you sleepy. ( that's what I do, doesnt seem to work tho! )
Use the bedroom only for sleeping or having sex. Don't eat, talk on the phone or watch TV while you're in bed. ( thanks for the advise, although i don't really need it. I'll never leave my bedroom no matter what! hehe )
Make sure your bedroom is quiet and dark. If noise is a problem, use a fan to mask the noise or use ear plugs. If you must sleep during the day, hang dark blinds over the windows or wear an eye mask. ( no eye mask, but I'm preety sure my room is dark enough with the curtains. )
If you're still awake after trying to fall asleep for 30 minutes, get up and go to another room. Sit quietly for about 20 minutes before going back to bed. Do this as many times as you need to until you can fall asleep. ( this is when my sister gets annoyed when I bunk onto her bed. )

Well, guess this is it. I am having insomnia. Oh bother. :(

needsmoresleeeeeeeeep.

luck and money.

2008-12-15T14:05:00.003+08:00

It was more than a year, we were all waiting for my cousins house, more to mansion, to be up and ready for them to move in. This morning, we attended the house warming, and boy was the house huge! So huge that it's eligible to be interviewed by MTV Cribs. It has always been my dream too, to own a house as big as theirs, and drive big fancy cars like theirs too. One things for sure, I'ma make my dream come true, and the person inspiring me to this is none other than my cousin herself. hehe.

Have you ever wished to live in a house like this?

Or drive around town with big fancy cars like this?

Well i have, although it may seem too far-fetched. but then, what are dreams for? lol. It'll take years to catch up on my dreams and hopes tho. Dreams and hopes of being the rich and famous, whilst still happy go lucky. Not everyone can live that way, and again, the one mild example, is my cousin. They're rich, they're famous, yet still a happy family. Yes, thats what you might have thought, money can't buy happiness, but u sure can make it happen.

Anyway, I cant stop biting my nails right now. It feels like just yesterday I sat for my SAM Finals, and in three days time, my results are going to be released online. I still remember when I started my examination, it was English first at 11.30am, and we were all nervous, some brokedown in tears a day before. I can still remember the fun we had waking up wee early, and calling each other to make sure we're awake (i.e Buddy System). Now, it's all like in a blink of an eye, it was all just yesterday. Time flies, I really cannot believe it, whatmore think about getting used to it. Guess this is life, we just can't run away from it. When the time comes, it'll be time to face it.

Date of fear OR hopefully, joy : 18th December 2008 at approximately 6.30am.

SHERI NEEDS LUCK!

Oh well, I'm feeling rather eerie now, talking to Kishy bout things I'm not suppose to be talking about. best part is, I actually told him. HIM! hahaha. The trust bro, don't abuse it. (;

puss in boots.

2008-12-14T14:19:00.002+08:00

My Boots Are Made For Walking. (:

finally.

this is me.

2008-12-14T11:22:00.004+08:00

It's back to square one?

Great, so I guess this is it. I always get the blame. I always get the yelling. I get more blames. I get the torture. AND I AM THE USELESS AND HOPELESS CHILD. and the reason to it, point clear, it's all because I'm the eldest child, and the eldest girl amongst the other two. So what?

One thing that I'm so sure of is that I certainly cannot wait to get out of this house, live MY LIFE on my own, and with no one else. including them. At home, there's never peace. My left goes my parents, my right goes my grandma and her nags, and my sisters drive me up the wall. Where do I stand? Where do I ever get a piece of my mind?

It's the holidays now, fuck it! So what if i spend my time online? I don't watch porn, neither do i hack and intrude others' privacy online. All I do at home is to just rot, rot and rot more. All I do online is facebook, and I hardly even chat. Even so, it's just my close friends i chat to, and no one else. Now, is that a crime? Oh yes it is, to my parents. In precise, my dad! It really crushes me inside out to actually see my parents think that I'm the only one in the whole wide world who's wasting my time like this. Rephrase: Wasting my time.

Just coincidently everytime dad comes home, it's me on the computer. Coincidently. And when my sisters use it, it's not a problem. Cos that's how he sees it. They hardly use it. But how is it I see it as? Well, yeah, blame it on me. I have to take the blame, I'm forced to. Thats why i don't have fun chatting online like how my other friends do. Thats why I'm left out in most conversations. Because even on the phone, it's all a fucking waste of time.

I would say, yes, it will be a waste of time if I have something to be done first and a priority to fulfil. but then again, it's December and fucking holidays! I hate holidays, i so do. I'm stuck at home, and it'll take me guts of 10 lions to get permission to leave the house for any occasions. ANY. Even for a sleepover at my cousins house. COUSIN! whatmore a friend. How pathetic, say it.

There's one thing that my parents certainly do not see in me yet. YET? or prolly never.

I'M GOING TO BE 18.

In 10 days time, I WILL BE 18!

SO PLEASE stop being so conservative, I'M OLD ENOUGH to make my own decisions!

sigh, whats the point of me saying? I'm still a little girl to them. fudge it.

MSN appoitment with sujen and his friend at 4pm: is just a MAYBE, IF i can.

Birthdays and mess.

2008-12-13T16:39:00.008+08:00

Today was just overwhelming, and there's the feel of a whole load of weight off my chest. I can finally breathe in my own room!

So i woke up, with the sight of my messy room every morning, which just cuts through my cornea; thus even with a blink of an eye, it's still there. I told myself this morning that this is it, today's spring cleaning day. Adios dust, adios dirt and adios creepy crawly bugs if there ever is. What made me so content this morning was that when i looked upon my table, I saw an envelope with my name written on it, and obviously it was posted to me. I wondered, from whom this may be as i studied the handwritting. I gave a wild guess and i knew which monkey friend of mine it was from! teehee. I still remember, i was still draped with my towel, and still dripping wet, yet i could not wait to unseal the envelope. So then, i opened it. And... to my astonishment, it was a birthday card from Mandeep Bains! I knew it was from him, my wild guess proved me right! It was his own creation and boy, was it hillarious. I could not resist but to snap a few pics of the card. It was too nice of him. hehe. What a brilliant idea he came up with JUST to wish me Happy Birthday in advance, and making sure that he doesn forget. cause obviously, he knows that if he ever does, he's dead meat. raawr. Since he's holiday-ing in Thailand now and before i leave to India, I understand why it was an advance. Nevertheless, it's the thought that counts and boy, was and am I glad. Certainly glad enough to have a good friend like him. (:

I'm rather startled tho that he actually knows me well enough to actually draw me and how I would react. I still remember when we normally hanged out, especially during someone's birthday, I would never fail to remind each and every one of them about my birthday. haha. Deprived much. When was the last i celebrated my birthday with my friends? Oh dear, there was never a last! So here it is, a conversation of myself and him, on paper. heeee.

So here it is, Mandeep Bains's birthday card creation to meyh! (:

As for this, FAYNK YOU A BUNCH, baiyah! brrruah!

Also, i'll give you the honour to be the first person to wish me for my birthday, altho 2 weeks early. teehee.

Ps/ I am definitely not getting old. teehee. I'm a vampire remember, and vampires do not age (i.e Dr Carlisle Cullen) aaaah!

I love love love love! :D

Okay so that was about it. Now back to my messy pessy sessy room. Well, not anymore, so don't you dare call me dirty! lol. I took a few shots of my room before and after the clean up, and boy was I relieved. My room smells like lavendar now; yes after spraying it with some air refreshener. It's now, waalah, spanking clean! heeeee, mom should be happy it's finally clean, after the fourth time nagging me to do so. Guess what, i bet she was happy, she got me a pair of boots i've always wanted! yipee! Nevertheless, I could not believe myself; the amount of books, papers, and rubbish I kept in my room ever since my exam started and ended sine a month plus ago.

The Junks and Mess

My SAM books and notes

And then, tadaaa!

See, i told you it's all clean now! *jumps of joy*. So basically that was it for the day. My plans of going to Pyramid later only to buy the boots were now not a plan anymore since mom had bought it for me earlier! cheers! So it was just me, my cousin and sisters at Pyramid, embarassing ourselves in the bowling alley. gee, i think if there was a competition of who gets the most 'longkang' side, it would be us as the number 1 winners. seriously. We looked up and compared our score sheet with the next lanes, and god know's where and how were we to put our face at. No doubt, the guys on the left lane were laughing and grinning at us. durh, this is what beginners get i presume. I scored 37 marks. beat that? trahaha. I think even the blind would do better. Oh well, i guess there's a start for everything we do.

Just before i end here, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY LOKZHA, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHRA!! love love love u both. mwah. (:

This will be it, now.

2008-12-12T22:25:00.002+08:00

Goodbye old, hello new.

I am left with no choice but to start a whole new blog which also means a whole new life, with a new blog followed by a new year, in just a few weeks time. So here i am, reminiscing the old, and pondering for the new.

Still getting used to this uber cool site, and no sujen, haha, blogspot is not; not for me. Love the gadgets, and it's definitely something we can't find in xanga. Oh well, this is just like from Friendster to Facebook. (:

A whole new world, a better place. (;

Whats going on in my mind: SAM RESULTS and nothing else. garh.